Cloudy : My day & heart

Hey morning blog..
It'll be a cloudy day i thought and the day is as cloudy as my heart now. I exactly don't know why i'm feeling this way whereas actually there are no accidents, incidents, or anything that I due to sad for :(
It's just.. Hemm.. Maybe it's just a sadness that had been collected for a long..

Or..
because i deeply deeply miss my family and my home sweet home in Kramat Jati (no doubt about it, it's always)


Or..

It's because of what i found last night?

Oh DAMN!!! Maybe it's true.

Last night i casually opened the inbox on his phone, there was one SMS from +6285718375778. I thought this was aimed just for fun. And then, i took a look to the history call. And..
Many received calls, missed calls, and even the dialled calls by and to that mistery number. I really really felt not really good about it. I don't know why..
I just.. Look! Recently, from my phone no tone rings anymore. Even if it occures, it's just from my sister or my mom. I always wish it comes from him.

I don't know exactly who is the owner of that mistery number. But he told me the owner is a woman, her name is Mbak ***. All i know, she is my O's colleague. But, it's odd. Could you imagine? I AM HIS WIFE, haven't been phoned by HIM anymore, or just say it 'rarely'. But Mbak ***? everyday, everytime..
And what did make me so desperately? He phoned her just not for a moment, but it's a long long and looong..

Hey boy!! Why don't you phone me anymore?!! What's the matter?! Is she more interesting than me?! Oh DAMN!! I can't believe it!!! If it's true, I just found out that you're absolutely blind boy! Ago, I'd been praised like a queen with many guys, but now you throw me out as if i'm so meaningless for you?!!
Oh..

I AM SPEECHLESS..

And you know? Maybe today i'm feeling blue also because of..

      the love that you gave..
                is comparable with the hurt that i've received :'(